popping out..

after roughly nine months and a week, the kiddo is finally out..the family’s first newborn is a bouncing baby girl..hardly no doubt she is my brother’s gracious daughter with her huge nose and crinkling forehead features (if emphasis be need put..:>)..

what a delight she is to everyone..being the first grandchild, she does get all the unwanting attention..

and while i’ve been in jest plotting out her exile to planet Pluto via TNT rocketing its way out, i’m all tamed at one glance at her..just mesmerized..amazed at the sight of such a beautiful tiny creature..

welcome aboard mary cassidy!..

pals worth-reminiscing..

true enough, there’s people you’d meet who you thought the least would become your friends but surprisingly..in very uncompromising ways, they become what you least expect them to be..

not my habit to drop names so i’ll just rhetorically label them..

there was this silly carefree peyups blockmate of mine (didn’t i just say i wouldn’t drop names..right) he always carries with him his silly and ridiculous antics..the kind of dude who’d find such pure delight in annoying and vexing people around him..if you’re a newbie in the envi or a first-timer then, you’d naturally be pissed..but for strange reasons though, his egoistic tricks wouldn’t get into my frail veins..despite how hard he laughs out his face over my sometimes weird demeanor or my jurassic ways, i just have a way of blocking him off..at one point, he confesses how he enjoys vexing me because it doesn’t seem to bother me at all..and i could only look back at him with my own mischievous grimace..and i guess he knows we understood each other then, even if rarely do we sit back and talk like normal good friends do..

and that mean girl..(right, pardon the adjective but nothing any more befitting eheh..a blockmate too way back peyups days..)..the kind you’d treasure not for many reasons but for little but really good and classy ones..the kind that you’d carry with you and reckon with yearning..she hated me so much for reasons i woudn’t know then..she wasn’t even candid about how she felt towards me but unforgivingly upfront about it..it was more than enough when she even managed to pinpoint me in an open forum with a group that amongst us, it was i she doesn’t like..i really wouldn’t know what exactly she was meaning then but it did bother me for a while..not because i wasn’t aware that i was nowhere near likeable..i’ve learned my lesson early on that you never can please everybody ergo, i really didn’t need her to teach me that lesson..but something in her indifference towards me made me wonder enough..not that it was totally getting into my nerves..but even so, i mustered enough courage to brush her aside..just blocked her off my way silently til then..never bothered to change an inch of me just because so (not everyone sees it but i have this silent meanness in me too..)..and so i kept my distance..two years after sharing the same classroom..who would have thought, that mean girl became one of my trusted pals (the coolest on a lighter note i should say)..the pivotal moment happened when our block was having a practice for a dance number..we both got tired at the same time so we sat at the sides..just the two of us..couldn’t figure how awkward that moment was but it sure did pave the way to a meaningful friendship..one of the best conversations really..then on, we didn’t’ become inseparable (we still went with different sets of friends..) but time to time, in between those frantic college stretch and strife, we’d always find a way to sit back and talk like we were the bestest of friends..sure, time does have its way of fixing things up..

the reminiscing has turn melancholic..good ole buddies..cutting out..:>

in the middle of somewhere..

just kicking off the summer shoes..

i’m nowhere in a fancy beach resort..nor in an exotic island..(not that i’m not wishing for it though..daydreaming ain’t gonna take you anywhere anyhow..) just in the middle of somewhere..

that somewhere is just somewhere away from home..and that’s quite a treat for itself..though nothing extraordinary, just away form the usual..

then again, you start reckoning..those things you thought you can’t live without, you actually can..

that somewhere is in a tiny abode in this small town..life down here is literally quiet, peaceful and slow.. good slow, that is..

and while everyone on earth is heating up..it’s nice to be out here, just dilly-dallying..loitering..taking those slow walks..in the middle of somewhere..

expired xmas blues..

it’s cliché but it really is the most wonderful time of the year..for one sole reason, it should be..

but in this age and time, hardly does Christmas feel like one when it does come around..i guess the reasons for celebrating it have come in a myriad ways..i need not bring out the cynic in me to justify my thoughts..it’s what separates kids from grown-ups..though there’s really no harm in being a kid at heart..or maybe i’m just then again sulking into my fondest yet gone-are-those-days childhood Christmas fantasies and adventures..those days our parents used to trick us on so-called Santa gifts..it was one Eureka moment the day we figured that the toys we would be having come Christmas eve were above our aparador..ergo, there really is no Santa Clause..i wouldn’t know now if I wanted to laugh or cry that very moment..it was one good way of starting to knock hard-core reality into our meagre senses..

in response to little Virginia’s query about Santa Clause: Santa does not exist..and so every little kid’s wishes vanished in thin air..when you’re a kid, it does..while there ain’t really no Santa Clauses, his spirit does exist..and that’s to say with utmost propriety, the spirit of giving and sharing..should i go on..ahmm..

then unlike a kid, you can’t wish for justice on Cristmas Day..you maketh it..

or you’d wish you’d be like that boy who never grows up..PETER PAN..was he?

the monster in me..

i am a peace-loving human being (and i’m hearing boisterous perks somewhere..) i am..i believe i am..

but times are not always how you’d normally cause them to unfold..much as you would want to do no harm..much as you would just nonchalantly (yet have a little due care still) let things be and let mundaneness do its routine madness..much as you would seem to be desperately brainfrozen by meekness and utter apathy --- the tendency to play it safe anyhow..some minds are really just too thick and chunky..

whatever is out there to be merry for (famous fairytale characters dancing your way)..

the thing is, i try hard..to hide the monster in me..that facet of my being that unleashes when my temper flares and my senses freak out..

i get mad pretty bad..i blow up pretty bad..but hey i always try to do it with some inch of class..i try at least..

only to fight..not to fight to cause hurt and induce pain..but only to fight to make a statement --- a really neat one..and knock some sense on senseless ego-busters..or simply-put, only to teach a nutty head some good ole grandma lesson..the kind that makes a crabby crab realize that the world revolves not just on its monstrous claws but on a million species of crawling and flying creatures too..

yes, i lost it again..but hey, i did justice on it..some people really need some growing up to do and a little taming on their jurassic manners..not that i ain’t in need of any though..but only because someone called and asked for it..i’d only have to give what was duly due then..

so while i am still trying to stand by my words and my act that one eventful moment of flare..i really need no anger management sessions..trust me..trust the monster in me..

motorela crimes..

after doing damage to jeepneys, the motorela a.k.a. pedicab, is the next victim in line..

once, i had 4 pesos..barely a peso short to pay..had to scamper through my messy bag, sifting through every pocket in it..nothing except two 10 centavo coins..and so i had to bargain with the driver..good gracious old man ‘manong driver’ didn’t let me off..i was only two blocks away anyhow, i would have sprinted my way to school..just in the nick of time for recitation..

another instance, my purse was badly empty..i only had bills..a hundred i reached to the driver..negotiating if he’d enough change for it, he started murmuring and blabbing in utter annoyance..i was not spared from manong driver’s lecture that night..in fact, i had a dose of it.. then again, i sauntered my way out the cab..

such a shame i couldn’t spare this minute traditional local transpo from my mischief..mindlessness..irresponsibility..

the offenses are indeed cuddling up..but is non-payment of fare a crime?! go figure..

having enough..

you wish you have more..but hey, don’t you have just enough..

a friend used to remind me every now and then that contentment is the only way to happiness..when you’re content with what you have and who you have, there’s hardly any room for lonely frustrating mood-sucking cravings..

to be happy is to be content..then again it is a state of mind..just as you can always choose to be happy..right, you can..then might as well start choosing to be content..

contentment is never complicated to begin with..it all starts and ends with a humble knowing that what you have is all you’ve got (at least, for the time being..) and being so, might as well make the dire most of what best you can maketh out of what’s in the palm of your hands..

and should you have more or less..what difference would there be..all the same, you will be glad about whatever is there..some or none, you’ll get by..